I have worked as a therapist for over 2 decades and 10 years ago I decided to retrain as a spiritual life coach. In 2017 I started to notice a pattern with my clients - emotional abuse... Something I had experienced and was healing from.
And it was whilst I was healing that I discovered a new language, it is the reason I wrote my book the A to Z of Emotional Abuse but it was whilst I was writing Finding Lily, that I discovered the patterns in my relationships.
Through my own journey, I know the damage emotional abuse leaves both in your internal and your external life, physical, and financial life.
This was a game and I didn’t have the rules. I was left a shell of my former self and I’d lost everything; I was broke and I was broken…
It was like living in a nightmare that I couldn't wake up from.
I was stuck in a debilitating cycle of questioning and doubting myself.
“If only I had said… If only I hadn’t said… Maybe if I had done… Maybe if I hadn’t done… “ I thought it was all my fault.
People said to me "you should really be over this by now", but it isn't that easy. I had no closure and then I started to realise this was a game.
I had literally lost everything and what was left, was slowly collapsing around me.
And just as I was pulling my life back together, I then had to go through the divorce process!
And it was during the divorce process I realised you need to have divorced them emotionally first, and the games they play to hurt you further.
I saw the manipulation that went on and I found myself screaming internally asking why no one else could see what was going on, one judge did and then I took the blame for the hold-up.
After my own divorce and more games, I wrote my book Divorce Matters. Divorce doesn't have to be hard unless you are divorcing someone who tries to manipulate it at every stage. Divorce Matters is a survival guide to learn how to set healthy boundaries, divorce emotionally, heal the trauma bonds, get closure and move on with your life.
At the beginning of my healing journey, I said I never wanted anyone to experience what I had been through. I later realised I couldn't stop people going through their DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL, but I could help them recover from it and a lot quicker I did.
So that is my mission, to help them understand why this happened and how they can recover and heal the original wounds.
I am so passionate about what I do that I have created two powerful modalities, 'The Original Wound' and 'Wound Talking'. Seeing my client's faces change physically after just one session inspires me.